Location: Philippines

Position: writer

Doing the Right Thing!

For sure you heard about school aged boys and girls ditching school, stealing money from purse, lying to cover up serious problems and things like that, right? Well these are the products of the age group negative characteristics that will disappear in the later years properly managed by parents.

According to statistics,

“about 35 percent of boys and 25 percent of girls admitted stealing something from a store .” In Lying, “more than 80 percent of students said they lied to a parent about something significant, and more than 40 percent said they lied if it would save money. “ Students in religious schools had about the same lying rate as those in public schools. Moreover, “ cheating on tests has become commonplace, the survey found, with 64 percent saying they had cheated on an exam in the past year, with 38 percent saying they cheated more than once. Again, attending a religious school was no saving grace, with 63 percent reporting cheating. “(*Josephson Institute of Ethics survey).

Children sometimes reason

that if they can lie, they might as well cheat and steal too, and then lie about cheating and stealing. Parents and educators often find these to be overwhelming and frustrating. Most kids know that lying, cheating, and stealing are wrong. Still, one in three students admits to having stolen something within the past 12 months, and 60% disclose they’ve lied to their parents at least 4 times within the same period. (*Josephson Institute of Ethics survey). These are the three common traits among school-aged children. According to the growth and development studies, these are normal. Parents have important role to perform in order to guide their children to the right path.

Role #1

Improve communication. Every word spoken by fathers and mothers has its influence over the children. Parents should bear in mind that a word spoken in due season may be as good seed in youthful minds and may result in leading little feet in the right path. But a wrong word may lead their feet in the path of ruin. Parents should keep the atmosphere of the home pure and fragrant with kind words. The biggest mistake parents make when confronting a child about lying is saying, “You are a liar!”. This gives them up for the only logical response the child can give which is, “I’M NOT!” A child who lies needs to be told very simply and without anger, “I don’t believe you!” Ideally this is said with genuine empathy. “I’m sorry honey, but I don’t believe you,” is far better than the other.

Role #2

Avoid confrontations in front of other people with your kid. Do not embarrass your kid around other people about the wrong done. Talking to them regarding these things should be done in private.

Role #3

Guide children towards trust and honesty. Spend time to teach children regarding virtues of life. Parents usually don’t have time to talk with there children due to pressures at work.

Role #4

Give lessons. Parents can now deploy their authority over their kid. They can do it by employing consequences over the wrong acts. Some form of payback or restitution is essential such as selling a prized possession to get enough money to replace a stolen object.

A piece from experience

My mom was calling me about a cousin who was stealing something from my her bag. When I asked her the age of the kid, and found out that he is a school-aged boy, I told her to tell the mother right away. The mother should approach his son, and tell him about the risk of growing up like that would end up in jail. Children tend to steal, lie, and cheat as part of their growth and development but the responsibility and task of the parents is to do the intervention in order to make the child becomes honest, responsible, and trustworthy in the future. Precaution in dealing with these children is a must.

They must approach their kids in a constructive way that won’t scar them emotionally but rather would lead them to live the right way. For instance, parents should always tell there children that cheating on a test is lying to ones self.  If the parents fail to intervene rightly with their children regarding these matters, children would think that doing cheating, lying and stealing are acceptable for lifetime as long as nobody sees them doing that. Parents need to take dedicated measures which completely bring a new change in their kids.

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